with permission.

If I could tell my 'pre-baby self' something I would say, give yourself permission.....

Give yourself permission to do absolutely nothing...and I mean nothing...but care for your baby the first month. All Isla wanted the first four weeks were to be in our arms, laying on us, with us, smelling us. I naively thought I would be able to return emails, get errands done or accommodate guests. When it came down to it I quickly realized I wasn't able to. I struggled with letting it all go but looking back it was the smartest and best decision for me and my baby. That time with her was precious and is already gone. Even though she still loves to cuddle or sleep on B or my chest or in our arms, the majority of her day is now spent figuring out the world and even though I'm grateful for that, I do miss the tiny baby who wanted nothing more than for one of us to hold her. You will cherish these early memories.

Give yourself permission to yell at your husband without feeling like your marriage is falling apart. The moment that feels like your world and your relationship are falling apart will come- most likely at 3am when the baby's screaming and you have tried everything, EVERYTHING to get her to sleep....you are the most sleep deprived you have ever been and you are convinced without a doubt that having children may have ruined your marriage, your relationship as you know it....

Just breathe deep, rock your sweet baby and know it will be ok.
Your marriage will be stronger, your love will be deeper and you will feel the sweetest kind of joy in knowing you're a family of three.

Give yourself permission to feel guilt. Guilt for hating the dog because she feels like a burden. It's ok, you will love her again shortly. Guilt for not cleaning your house. It doesn't matter right now (you have a lifetime to clean the kitchen). Guilt for wanting time alone: with your husband and by yourself. Guilt for not bringing in money when you know you're doing the hardest job there is.

Just plain GUILT.
Feel it and give yourself the permission to Let-It-Go.

Give yourself permission to have "Time." Time to let your body heal and go back to what it was. Don't stress about those pre-baby jeans even though they stare you in the face every morning. You just created a human--those jeans will fit again when the time is right. Time with your spouse alone. Time by yourself alone. Time to talk to on the phone with your girlfriends because you know they keep you sane. Time to go on one more walk because you know it may buy you an extra hour of sleep even if dinner's an hour late. (Lets be honest, it's a miracle you're cooking).

Most importantly, give yourself permission to slow down and be mindful.
Everyone is busy- busier and doing more important things than everyone else....allow yourself to recognize that these moments are pivotal, momentous, life altering, beautiful .... and fleeting.

Live them with joy and mind fullness.


Happy Weekend Everyone.

xoxo
S