Growth.Spurt

This is gonna be a Mama rant which I feel pretty comfortable spewing on this blog. 

I am SO DAMN TIRED. 

It's just SO poetic that as soon as Isla started sleeping 12 hours through the night I stopped sleeping and my days got crazy. Isla's going (and I just spelled that 'gowing'--my brain is mush!) through a major growth spurt (I assume)....as evidenced below. I literally feel like I spend my days with a destructive tribe of mongrels....but no, it's just my 19lb-13 month old. 

She is resisting naps. She literally runs from me and when I finally wrangle her into a new diaper and her footy PJ pants, give her milk and try to rock her she lays still for a minute and then sings a little, "maaaaaa-maaaa. MAMAMA-maaaa-maaaa" in my ear just to remind me that she's not sleeping. UG! 

She spent a good 4 minutes talking gibberish to the garbage can this morning. Her verbal growth is going crazy. 

She is climbing on everything which literally raises my blood pressure just thinking about it. Not only because it's insanely dangerous seeing her scale our dining room chair and proceed to try and furniture hop to a counter or side table. Yesterday I caught her up on a little bamboo footstool in the bathroom trying to get on B's countertop where his razor was left out, but also because all of her messes have been moved up now that she can climb and sweep a table in one motion. Nothing leaves her feeling more giddy. 

She also is just purely destructive. She stomps around all over her toys, throws things and loves to hear crashes and booms. 

I know all of this is perfectly normal. Perfectly, insanely, absolutely exhaustingly normal. 

Earlier this week I thought I was pregnant. Literally pregnant. (Don't get excited I'm not. 100% not) Wanna know what had me convinced? The dull ache in my lower back, how absolutely exhausted I am, break-outs, the early morning sniffles and constant pee breaks. After taking a test and seeing a very decisive 'not pregnant' I couldn't decide whether to be relieved or annoyed that Isla had caused most my pregnancy symptoms. 

and last but not least.....

One perfect example of her craziness....I just went in to check on her because she woke up after laying down for her nap for 5 minutes. I saw her throw Fox and Monks from her bed and then poke a light switch behind her crib (don't worry--it's baby-proofed). I went in to find out she'd blown out her diaper. (She blew out THREE diapers on her HOUR nap yesterday. I literally wanted to scream.) So I changed her. Apparently I must be heavy sighing a lot lately because when I laid her down she was talking all kinds of gibberish and "ma-ma uhhhhhhhhhhh" was twisted up quite a bit in it. Her big heavy sighs sounded like growling that apparently I'm going to have to keep in check. 

Then after I nursed her she looked at me...square in the eyes.... and barfed straight down my cleavage. There's nothing like seeing a big barf of clotted milk go down your shirt and into your bra. Then as I'm rocking her she leans back, looks at me and shakes her head while wagging her finger near my face....as if she was scolding me for even considering that she would nap today. And now....she's protesting in her crib which probably means I'll relent and we'll go to Target without a nap--which will most likely turn into a complete and utter meltdown disaster complimented by the judging stares of old women and young people. REALLY?! You try spending an afternoon with her---you'd look like this and be this crazy too!

So...that's me. How are you all? 

Time to get her up. FIVE min nap today. 

God help me. 

S